Burn Baby Burn

While cleaning out the large pile of unread magazines dumped onto the floor next to the coffee table, I came across two articles about the importance of vitamin D, which has been known for a long time as essential for helping bones absorb calcium and preventing osteoporosis and rickets.

Historically, we've gotten most of our vitamin D from the sun. But with the increase in sunscreen use over the years, coupled with an indoor lifestyle behind computers, people in mild climates such as ours are becoming deficient in vitamin D.

New research shows that this deficiency can actually increase our chances of cancers such as breast, prostrate and colorectal, and it has been noted that "the death rate from the cancers for which vitamin D appears to provide some protection outnumber skin-cancer deaths by 30 to 1." (Eating Well magazine, August 2007).

So some specialists are now recommending moderate sun exposure without sunscreen. I love this kind of revelation: It's bad for you. No wait, not only is it not that bad, you may be worse off without it or by using a synthetic alternative (dark chocolate, butter, wine, meat, eggs, sugar, sunshine).

I would be jumping for joy about this vitamin D news if it weren't for, oh, I don't know, my brand new SUN ALLERGY. Yeah, I now get a rash on my arms if exposed to the sun for longer than it takes to check the weather. After 34 years of very rarely using sunscreen, I now have to slather myself with SPF 50 just to drive the car or water the flowers. I guess it's my skin's way of telling me I'm too old to be frying in the sun as I did in my youth.

So I will be the one out on the beach lying on my belly, covered from head to toe in a lightweight SPF fabric, except for the large white patch of ass soaking in the rays. I still need my vitamin D after all.