Early Morning Catechism
Yesterday morning Harrison wore a glow-in-the-dark rosary and carried around a chopstick (substituting for a ruler) and a black sunglasses case (substituting for a bible). He sat me down, opened the sunglasses case, and gave me a lesson on being good.
He did this because the day before I brought home a Nunzilla from the Late Night Catechism performance I took my mom to.
Nunzilla shoots sparks out of her mouth as she wobbles along. I explained to H why she held a ruler and a bible, though I didn't want to go into what a bible was, so I simply said it was a book with lessons about being good (that's not totally wrong, is it?)
I also didn't explain the crucifix on his rosary (from my mom), but when he noticed there was a man on it, I said the man was the goodest man who ever was and this was a celebration of his goodness. I'm trying here.
Late Night Catechism was held at ACT in a side room on a tiny stage surrounded by thirty chairs. The stage was set to resemble the front of a classroom where catechism classes take place. Holy posters, art, little statues and catholic tchotchkes galore. With only thirty seats, there was no hiding, but at least I chose the 2nd row instead of the 1st.
I should have heeded my mother's advice and crammed my dusty Catholicism for Dummies before seeing the show. Not that I would have enjoyed it more - I laughed as hard or harder than most people in the audience - but I might have been less terrified of the Sister calling on me. My practice of Catholicism started and ended with my baptism at age two, and the only thing that stuck was the guilt.
The sister called on about six people in the audience, all of whom went to at least eight years of catholic school. She wasn't shy about teasing them or proving their answers wrong. Thankfully, she never called on me.
But I did learn a few things. For instance, the Immaculate Conception was not Mary being miraculously impregnated by God (as I thought), but Mary herself being conceived without the stain of original sin. You're welcome for that bit of cocktail trivia.
My mom, who grew up catholic, had a great time. She's even more easily amused than I am, and gets out even less often, so it was a pleasure to treat her to the show. But the best part was that my souvenir made Harrison want to be a nun. It was only for an hour, but I'll take it.
He did this because the day before I brought home a Nunzilla from the Late Night Catechism performance I took my mom to.
Nunzilla shoots sparks out of her mouth as she wobbles along. I explained to H why she held a ruler and a bible, though I didn't want to go into what a bible was, so I simply said it was a book with lessons about being good (that's not totally wrong, is it?) I also didn't explain the crucifix on his rosary (from my mom), but when he noticed there was a man on it, I said the man was the goodest man who ever was and this was a celebration of his goodness. I'm trying here.
Late Night Catechism was held at ACT in a side room on a tiny stage surrounded by thirty chairs. The stage was set to resemble the front of a classroom where catechism classes take place. Holy posters, art, little statues and catholic tchotchkes galore. With only thirty seats, there was no hiding, but at least I chose the 2nd row instead of the 1st.
I should have heeded my mother's advice and crammed my dusty Catholicism for Dummies before seeing the show. Not that I would have enjoyed it more - I laughed as hard or harder than most people in the audience - but I might have been less terrified of the Sister calling on me. My practice of Catholicism started and ended with my baptism at age two, and the only thing that stuck was the guilt.
The sister called on about six people in the audience, all of whom went to at least eight years of catholic school. She wasn't shy about teasing them or proving their answers wrong. Thankfully, she never called on me.
But I did learn a few things. For instance, the Immaculate Conception was not Mary being miraculously impregnated by God (as I thought), but Mary herself being conceived without the stain of original sin. You're welcome for that bit of cocktail trivia.
My mom, who grew up catholic, had a great time. She's even more easily amused than I am, and gets out even less often, so it was a pleasure to treat her to the show. But the best part was that my souvenir made Harrison want to be a nun. It was only for an hour, but I'll take it.
posted by Anne at 10:29 AM
21 Comments:
Does this mean that he's given up on the dream of being a pirate in favor of the nunnery? :)
I've heard that show was good - we'll have to check it out!
Oh no, being a pirate (or other equally brutish character) still takes priority. So I'll take any inclinations to a softer side.
The show was pretty good in an innocent way (unlike the more racy show you recently saw). ;-)
Ahh, that big misconception about "immaculate conception" always made me nuts. Most people do think it has to do with a virgin birth.
I've also always been stumped by the fish that say "Darwin" inside them. The fish is symbolic of Christianity and the 'Darwin' is meant to speak toward Evolution - which really argues against the ideas set forth in the Hebrew Scriptures. This always bugs me, too. I believe in evolution, I just hate how, in an attempt to be clever, the Darwin-fish are just...ignorant.
Eh, sorry, I'm crabby because I'm sick.
Hmmm, R. Your comments are intriguing me. Did you study religion? Or did you learn from practice? Or perhaps it's just one of your many interests?
I often wished I took a World Religions course in college. The subject is too impactful to be ignorant of.
Hope you feel better soon.
I think Harrison should be a nun for Halloween. Heh.
I was also raised Catholic, but am not practicing by any extent of the word today. I can remember services done in Latin with plenty of incense more vividly than many other things from my childhood.
Sigh...
Hi, Angie,
Thank you for the well wishes. I just woke up (it's 1:30 a.m. here) after a nice four hour nap.
I have a minor in Theology. I only pursued college degrees guaranteed to net me the smallest income on their own. Good thing I wanted to go to law school or I'd be homeless.
I did grow up Catholic and go to Notre Dame so my experience is both from practice (which I no longer do) and from general interest in the subject matter.
My theology kick began on the first day of Theology 101 when the professor said, "Read the Pentateuch for Wednesday's class." I was the only one who did not know what that was (I did not go to a Catholic high school). I asked and he said, "The first five books of the Hebrew Scripture." (This is also where I learned not to refer to it as the "Old Testament".) I said, "OHHH, The TORAH." And he laughed and said yes.
Most of my high school was Jewish.
And then I decided I didn't like not knowing about the whole thing. :P
I went through a phase in which I was frustrated if I didn't know something about an opera so I bought a book that summarized major operas and read through it and went to the music library to listen to as many as I could. Currently, I'm in the ballet stage. I couldn't believe how many people knew so much about the American Ballet Theatre company (I knew nothing) - and it bugs me when I don't know anything about something that so many people do know about.
A portion of my bookshelf is filled with nothing but bibles. I admit to sort of feeling like one can not be considered well read if s/he has not read the bible. There are a staggering number of literature references to the bible. Which, is the approach I'd take if reading the bible itself - as a piece of literature. But definitely not the kind read front to back. There's an art to reading it in a certain order.
Now I'm blogging in your blog. ;) Anyway - yes, studied it a bit.
-R.
The first day of my Biblical Narratology (also primarily Hebrew Scripture) course last year, we all sat around the table and introduced ourselves. I was the only person in the room who was not raised either Jewish or Catholic and so was the only person who had read the Bible as literature exclusively. My professor was more than a tad surprised by my lack of religious upbringing.
I agree with RE, there are far too many religious references in literature to not have some understanding of the Bible. I teach both a Shakespeare course and an Early British Survey. Shakespeare references the Bible more than any other text (his second: Ovid's Metamorphoses), but I've found that my knowledge of religious texts has been particularly beneficial in teaching the British Survey course. Half way through this term, one of my students noted that her lack of knowledge of religious stories, iconography, etc. was a detriment in a course like ours because she was constantly asking about images and names that many of us understood as Biblical references. I'm by no means an expert, but when the Pope was in town a few weeks back and I was at a friend's house for second night seder and we were watching the Pope give Mass at Yankee Stadium, I could at least explain the various parts of mass to the people gathered (yes, the irony of the atheist at a Passover seder explaining the elements of Catholic Mass is mildly entertaining).
I, too, only collect degrees that guarantee a lack of employment: BA: Dramatic Lit; MA: Shakespeare; PhD: English. I wasn't clever enough to choose Law School.
Wow, there is quite the brain trust on this blog! Can I still comment even though I'm finishing up my Undergrad? :)
Your evening does sound tamer than our wild night. Maybe we'll have to surprise you and Robin with a trip (Ha - right, that means I'd actually have to go again - shudder)
Lynch - I like the Halloween idea. Would cause much confusion at the preschool party.
Incense and Latin would stay in my head for a long time too.
R - Wow. Thank you for your detailed response. That would explain it.
I totally understand about being frustrated by not knowing about something everyone else seems to know plenty about. I like being around smart people, so that happens to me a lot. If I listen and ask questions, at least I won't sound so out of it and I'll learn something.
I also agree that you can't call yourself well-read if you haven't read the bible. It's been on my list for a long time. I even considered bible study courses to force myself to read it. And we have it on CD. Maybe I'll go find one in our bookshelves and keep it in my nightstand to remind me.
Good for you for having the motivation to learn about many things fully. I'm proud of you and I've never even met you.
I hope you were able to fall back to sleep. :-)
Em - "the atheist at a Passover seder explaining the elements of Catholic Mass". That is HILARIOUS. I love it. See, you're one of those people I have to listen to and ask questions of. :-)
Maybe you're not rolling in material wealth, but you're rich with love and intelligence. And cute to boot. ;-) That's nice until you need to pay the rent, I know.
Can't wait to see you soon!
Bev - Yes, please comment!
Hmm, I think I got the gist of the show from Tania's blog. I'm perfectly fine going to another show that you haven't seen before. :-D
R - I forgot to mention (since we're on the subject of religion), I was shocked by the presumptuous commenter on your blog that reprimanded you for saying "Jesus." I almost mocked it, but decided not to get involved.
On the other hand I mocked it :)
Lynch - Heh, just read that. Good for you.
I just read this post about the US being #1 in reading the bible. How's that for feeling like everyone else knows more than me?
Hi, Angie,
Yes, I was more than a little surprised to see the... ferocity of the comment. Of the many responses that came to mind, it seemed best to simply advise her that it was most likely not the last time it might happen. Then she can make her own educated judgment on if she wishes to continue to read my blog, at the risk of being highly offended.
She then posted an entry in her own blog entitled "Taking the name of the Lord in vain" the body of which said, "What a pompous twat. Bye for now."
She had deleted the entry but...alas, too late. Had she simply told me, in a mature, reasonable, and adult fashion, that it had offended her, I would have given it more thought. However, the allusions to death threats did not contribute to any semblance of rational thinking and therefore, to any further consideration of her point.
I'm not into temper-losing. It makes people look like downright idiots.
And that's about as nice a response as I can give the situation.
On to other things...if you do decide to read the bible, I'd spare yourself some sections and would not read it straight through. If you want some broad recommendations, I'd be happy to suggest a book or reading guide.
You know what struck me most about your comment? I honestly don't recall the last time anyone said they were proud of me.
-R.
R - I thought you handled it very diplomatically. Unbelievable that she would make it worse by repeating it on her own blog.
"I'm not into temper-losing. It makes people look like downright idiots."
So very true. She did not look favorable with the way she expressed herself.
I hope the "proud" comment wasn't weird. At the time it seemed like a natural thing to say to someone who takes continuing education seriously. Must be the mother in me. I say it often to my kids.
Yes, please give me your bible recommendations. I may not get to them anytime soon, but I can add them to my list.
Hi, Angie,
Thank you for saying I handled it diplomatically.
I used to have a temper. I will say this for Boss: She cured me of that. I lost my temper once and she said, "Uh uh." And she meant it. I learned.
The proud comment wasn't weird to me. It was nice. Thank you.
As for bible reading, I recommend Reading the Old Testament by Lawrence Boadt and Reading the New Testatment by Pheme Perkins. Both are very good at giving each book an historical context so you know what was going on when the author penned it. I also enjoyed God, a Biography by Jack Miles, for which he won a Pulitzer in 1996.
I would imagine you have a protestant bible (like the King James). Catholic bibles contain a few extra books - sometimes referred to as the apocryphal books but more appropriately referred to as Deuterocanonical books. Any old bible will do, though.
Personally, I'm a fan of some very specific things and will list one example. Deuteronomy 30:19. Moses has led the Jews through Egypt and is getting ready to leave them. He's telling them his final words, his final instructions. He said, "I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. Choose life."
It is as if he says to them that they will be faced with many challenges, many decisions - and there will often be right and a wrong - a good and an evil. Choose good. It's a very simple, powerful message. Two paths: Life and death. Choose life.
R - Thanks for the recommendations. I've added them to my list. And for your example. I found the excerpt in a teeny bible we have. That's perhaps the second time in my life I've opened a bible.
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